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Enduring the Quiet Storm
Don't quit before the miracle arrives.
All of my greatest transformations have come with the willingness to endure the quiet storm that always comes right before the transformation.
I say “quiet storm” because the silent moments right before the miracle are some of the most deafening. They just hit differently.
I think about the first moment I decided to be curious instead of defensive, or the first time I put down my phone instead of texting someone I’d had a “friends with benefits” situation with, or the first time I set a boundary… in all of these moments I felt like I was giving up a drug, and in some ways, I was. In that moment of making the choice that would ultimately be both expansive and empowering, I felt like I was going to die.
Dramatic much?! Right? But seriously, though… a part of me did have to die. In all the moments where you choose a new behaviour, you are flooded with both possibility and grief. The joy of what you can now create, and the grief for recognizing that you waited this long to choose it. If you don’t know how to sit with either or both of these emotions, you are being asked to become someone who can.
This is where most of us stop. We stop RIGHT BEFORE the transformation. We quit right as we’re about to become everything our heart and soul have been yearning for.
But here’s the thing: a choice is simply a choice. To choose to go “left” vs “right” is no different intellectually than choosing to be reactive or curious. Choosing to show up for yourself, for love, for life — is no different than choosing to walk a different way to work. But they feel WAYYYYYYYY different, don’t they? Let’s dive WAY DEEPER into this. Prepare yourself because I’m going to reframe this in a way you’ve likely never heard before.
When you let go of old ways of being, you become a new being. When you say “goodbye” to old behaviours, you are creating not only a new self but also the new life that comes along with being that new person.
Think about what you MOST want in this life. What is it? Declare it.
Think about the type of person who gets that thing. Think about the people you know, personally or not, who have that thing, who exemplify the behaviours you desire to embody yourself.
Copy them. Read their books. Listen to their podcasts. Download their knowledge. Take what you want; release what doesn’t align.
There are simple formulas and behaviours that create epic businesses, lives, relationships and all the things. They are not secrets. They are not for “special people” or “lucky people.” To see it that way is to make yourself a victim for not having accessed your potential. It further blames our world and circumstances for not choosing the untapped potential that shakes our bones and breaks our hearts.
I say this not to negate the life you’ve had that has maybe been quite painful. I say this to wake you up from the spell of believing you have to tolerate lesser versions of yourself and others.
That “quiet storm” is a chorus of all the times your soul has said: “Listen. Feel. Become. Grow. Change. Love. Apologize. Leave. Begin. Create. Speak. Leap. Laugh. Let go. Trust.” And maybe you didn’t listen. Maybe it’s the first time you’ve turned towards yourself.
Because we have been scolded for not listening to parents and teachers and authority figures, we scold ourselves in the same way for not having listened to ourselves. The world tries to use shame to shape our behaviour, so we do the same.
I invite you to relate to the “quiet storm” differently. Your soul, the inner voice, God, Universe… whatever you want to call it — does not know shame. It only knows grace. The loud echoes of the chorus of your soul are not yelling because they’re angry; they’re loud because you’ve accessed a channel of wisdom and knowledge that is hungry to be heard. It’s the pent-up energy of alignment and possibility. It is the untapped potential of your heart, your purpose, and what is excited to flow through you. It is the dam of the divine breaking and ready to create alongside you.
So, wherever you’re at, whatever is trying to move through you, whatever you’re processing, whatever you’re letting go of, whatever addiction you’re stepping away from… meet yourself with grace. It is the perfect time to become everything you’ve always been.
Don’t quit before the miracle arrives.
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